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Me, Myself and CRAZY !!!

~~~ love me tender & lick me to death ~~~ confession of a desperate housewife

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KIBBS FF: Caffeine deficiency (oneshot)

Title                              : Caffeine deficiency (one shot)

Fiction                          : KIBBS, humor/romance

Rating                           : PG 13

Spoiler                         : none

Disclaimer                    “NCIS…definitely not mine, just enjoy my fiction



To dani, Ditte3, dolphinsiren, I heart TV’luvin-hottie, Mindy Harmon (Amanda), lisse, Cleo nightingale: THANK YOU for your review and support wouldn’t be writings without you guys…..KIBBS FOREVER.


It’s been hell, it’s been one week of purgatory, and her boss is killing her and her friends.

Gone, all the sweet charm in him, gone, all the sexiness in him.

She was falling for him and she is still falling for him.

Slowly but surely, she hates him, the cranky old bastard.

Forever yelling and snapping at all of them.


“AARRGGHH… I want to kick Gibbs’s ass Tony!!!” Kate screams loudly in the pantry.

“SSShhh…Kate…shh… please, don’t be so loud” Tony replies cautiously.

“I think you are very annoying Kate, but if boss kills you, It will be just me and McGee…that’s not good, he’ll kill us both within a week” Tony shakes his head; he is tired and annoyed with their current situation too.

“What’s his problem? JERK! One of this days Tony, I’ll make him sorry, he ever snaps at us” Kate is day dreaming

“WHAT?” Tony chokes on his hot chocolate.

“I’ll tell him off” Kate walks out of the pantry, head up.

Oh no, Tony thought, my beautiful colleague, she is going to die, ex secret service, ex NCIS, in grave, kill by her own boss,


And when Tony drives to work this morning, he realizes that today is the day. Today is the day it’s going to happen.



Killed by her own boss Leroy Jethro Gibbs, ex marine, still a hard ass.


Damn! Tony curses silently.

Why does Tony think that today is Kate’s Armageddon?

It’s because, the coffee shop that Gibbs always gets his coffee is closed. He saw in on his way to work. He imagines what it will do to his caffeine addict’ boss.


It is past midday.

From 8 in the morning until 3 in the evening, each of Gibbs’ people has a dose of his wrath. Special Agent Todd and McGee got a triple dose, Ducky the M.E, Abby the Goth Techie and Tony got double dose of his wrath.

Even the good Director Morrow notices his senior agent’s craziness. It must be coffee or women or a hard case, or a lethal combination of three. He shudders, thinking about Gibb’s agents’ condition. The director decided to stay in his office, catching up on paper work.


Abby is whining to Ducky, she is complaining, almost crying.

“C’mon Ducky, you got to talk to him, pleaseeeeee…”

“I do not have a death wish Abigail, I am still young and I don’t want to end up on the cold slab”

“Ducky… pleaseeeeee… you got to tell him off” Abby continues wailing.

Ducky walks away from the noise that she made.

Suddenly the intercom buzzes.

“Ducky, autopsy” his face changes as he listened.

“C’mon Abigail…let’s go”

“What’s wrong Ducky?”

“We got to save Caitlyn”

“Why Ducky”

“It was McGee, Caitlyn is losing her mind, she is telling you-know-who-off”

“Yeaaahhh…you go Kate…Kate rocks” Abby cheers for Kate

“Oh dear, oh no Caitlyn, please, don’t…” Ducky prays in his heart. She is so sweet and kind and young, compares to the old bastard Jethro.



“What did you say?” Gibbs whispers out of shock

“You are not deaf Gibbs; you heard what I said…” Kate is standing in the middle of his bullpen. Tony and McGee shrink in their seat, heads down, eyes peeking up at the scene in front of them.

“What did you say Agent Todd?” he shouts at her

“I said, I have enough of your stupid, rude comments and mood, Gibbs.”

“What comments are you talking about?” He looks at her dangerously

“That we are not good enough, where’s the damn results, I’m going to fire your ass, I’ll kick you to…” she rants on, Kate doesn’t care, she is having her PMS, beats that!


“If you don’t shut your mouth, I’ll fire you”, he shouts

“You have no reason to fire me Gibbs, I did my job and I am good at it” she replies smugly

Ducky and Abby arrived.

Gibbs holds his hand to them, signaling them to stay put and shut the hell up. He wants to kill Katie Todd, the woman he secretly has a crush on, and it’s been difficult to bottle it up. But today she is pissing him off.

Ducky and Abby hold each other hand. Ducky sees that Director Morrow is upstairs, looking down at the scene.

All eyes and ears are on Special Agent Gibbs and Todd. All other agents around them practically freeze on the spot, quietly watching the match they never expect. Some of them are making bets; most of them are rooting for Kate.


“Gibbs, please, I know it’s the coffee” She pleads with her boss

“It’s the lack of caffeine that’s making you this way, all angry and frustrated” she goes on

“Usually, you have about 15 cups by this time, today. ZIP, nada, none”

Gibbs is going crazy, how dare she blame the coffee for his behaviors, well, there is some truth, but the main reason is her, herself, working with him almost 24/7 at close proximity but he can’t touch her and have his way with her, that’s frustration!

“I have enough of it…” she keeps talking

“You have enough of what …Kate?” he asks her slowly, very dangerously

“Let me help you Gi…” and Gibbs cuts her off.




“Let me help you Gibbs, It takes less than 5 minutes” she persists

“I’ll guarantee, you’ll calm down and docile for a few hours”

“WHAT?” he shouts at her

“Yeah, C’mon… the interrogation room is empty” she offers

“See, I read a book on the weekend and it’s about…”


“A BOOK CAN”T HELP ME KATE!!!” not believing her attitude, she is not afraid of him.

“Less than 5 minutes Gibbs, I promise, less than 5 minutes”

“What the HELL you can do in 5 minutes?” he can think of something.

“C’mon, I’ll help you and please stop shouting…”

Gibbs is dumbstruck, what’s with her kamikaze style today, he keeps quiet, trying to calm himself down.

“You are a coward Gibbs, you are all bluff and screams…” she is disappointed.

And she heard gasps of shock around her.

“What Tony?” she said to Tony who is now tugging her hand, he is really afraid for her safety, he saw murder in Gibbs’ eyes.

“Look Tony, he has no caffeine, I’m having my PMS, bring it on” she doesn’t care, “So, let’s have it”

“Let her Dinozzo” Gibbs said to Tony but looking at Kate. Ducky and Abby hold each other tighter, not moving.


Gibbs is fuming mad, he hold on to his table in front of him, the only thing that separates him and the woman in front of him.

He lost it “What… the hell…you think… you can…do?”, “ You, woman…has no…clue…you are…a fool if…you think…you can help me…” he said his doubts and goes own, his tone getting louder by the seconds.


Kate’s ears’ ring, they hurts, her tummy hurt, her head hurt, she is sweating, she is pissed, she is humiliated. She saw everybody is gawking at them, while he is shouting at her. Damn, even Morrow is there.

Hell No, she thought, NO WAY she is going to be embarrassed by him. She is going to humiliates him too, and hoping her method can help me at the same time. At this point she got nothing to lose.


Ducky gasps, Abby squeals, McGee and Tony almost faint in their sit when they see Kate stalks around Gibbs’s desk to reach him.

Gibbs is shocked to see her standing so close to him, he can feels her breath, she is unafraid of him, damn it. Has he lost it?

She looks angry, her eyes full of fire and he feels her grabs his arms to face her.


She holds his face gently by her palms with a purpose.

“Five minutes Gibbs, trust me…Gibbs” she whispers to him, looking up at him.

She raised her toes to try to match his height and graze her lips to his, gently. When he doesn’t push her away…she kisses him.

He feels her soft lips eating his mouth; she licks his mouth and nudges his teeth with her tongue, which does it for him.


He opens his mouth slightly to let her enters her tongue and then he eats her mouth.

They are kissing.

They are making out, first base of course.

Both his hands are on her small back, stroking and pulling her closer to him. Damn, she is short, much better in bed he thought.

She tastes his mouth, he tastes her sweet lips, devouring each other, and their embrace is heating up by the seconds, from sweet to carnal, oblivious to their shocked audiences.


Ducky smiles; Abby smiles and jumps up and down; Tony and McGee’s mouths gaped open.

Director Morrow is beyond shocked, he couldn’t believe his eyes, and he shakes his head. Unbelievable, it must be the stress he thought. The other agents around them froze in horror, eyes on them. They can’t believe it, how could the sweet and beautiful Kate did that, with GIBBS? She lost it, they thought.


They continue their kiss. McGee and Tony who are nearest to them can almost feel the heat from them. And OH MY GOD, is that a moan? Did they hear moans? Who is moaning? Their boss? Kate? It’s the both of them! The both of them are moaning to each others throats. This can’t be happening, Tony and McGee thought, they feels their own face red.

Their head is twisting with each other, trying to deepen their passionate kiss.

She feels him getting hard; he felt her grinding her groin to his, he felt her tongue in his mouth, dancing with pleasure. God, that is so good… unbelievably good.

One of his hands is still on her back, while the other one has snakes up to hold her face.


Then the inevitable happens. They have to breathe, do they have to?

They break their kiss slowly, lips still touching, gasping for air, breathing hard, faces flushed, her hands on his shoulders, his hands cupping her face.


After several attempts to breath, Kate asks with a smile on her face.

“So? Does it help?” Gibbs doesn’t answer, he is just breathing hard

“Yes? NO?” “Do you feel better” she whispers to him sweetly

“How many cups of coffee, do you rate the kiss?” she is desperate for his reassurance

“5?... no?... 4?... no?...3? no? 2” no?...at least 1 cup?” she pulls herself from him and walks away, annoyed and humiliated.

She is disappointed; she composed herself, walking toward the head.


“Kate…” Gibbs calls her

“Yeah…” she feels like crying

“It helps Kate…” he clears his throat, she smiles.

“It was not five cups Kate…It worth 10 cups…”

“Thanks Gibbs” she continues her walks

“Kate…” a more persistent tone from him, making her stops and turns to look at him in the eyes.

“It was less than five minutes Kate…”

“I know Gibbs…you don’t need five minutes” She turns back and continues her walk.

‘I don’t?” he is curious

She stops again and said to him “Two minutes are more than enough for you Gibbs” and she winks at him before she finally heads towards the bathroom.

Gibbs is smiling, looking down, speechless; “Wow” he manages to say.